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Writer's pictureAnuj Chadha

How do I get out of a rut?

Updated: Dec 10, 2023


Are you feeling like you are stuck in a rut? Are you experiencing Monday morning Blues? Does it feel like a burden to get yourself out of bed and pull yourself to work? Does work feel like a drain?

 

Do you want to get rid of this feeling? If the answer is yes, then you have taken the first step already. Ironically, without it being a conscious decision, when we are feeling like work is a drain on our energy, our mind gets into a self-fulfilling prophecy that perfectly explains to us why there is nothing worth getting excited for at work. Satisfied with that justification we convince ourselves that we are better off staying in the rut and there is nothing worth spending our energy to get out there. So if you answered 'yes' to the above question, then you have already gone past the phase of justification, and you are looking for ways to get out of this feeling of stagnation.

 

Let's explore three ways to get out of the rut, depending on how deeply you feel stuck.

 

  1. First, if you feel like this is a passing phase and you will emerge from it soon, then you are perhaps ready. In this situation, it may be helpful to find that one thing that inspires you - that positive minded friend or colleague, that inspiring TED Talk, your favourite high energy song, going out for a run, painting a picture or cooking a special meal for yourself. Immerse your mind in that positive energy and let it uplift you out of the dullness. It’s a kickstart that does the trick for you!

  2. Second, let's go a step deeper. If you feel like this is more than just a passing phase: You have stayed in this mental state of doldrums for weeks, if not months, and you really need to overcome your doubts. You need to be convinced why you should put in any effort to get out of this state of mind. This is a situation where you could consider reaching out for support from a coach or a mentor. The key success factor here is working with someone you will be able to trust enough to share and discover what has pulled you into this state of mind, and what's keeping you there. A good coach or mentor will be able to help you probe within and identify your beliefs that are most likely coming in the way of your success. In a coaching journey you learn to see your beliefs for what they are and even overwrite them with a new narrative that helps you achieve your aspirations.

  3. Third, let's go even deeper. You feel like nothing is really worth trying: You have tried so many times before, and it always brings you back to the same situation. If you can see a pattern that has brought you into this state of mind multiple times over the last few years. In this type of situation, it will be advisable to seek support from a strong coach or even a good therapist. The deciding factor between a coach or a therapist is identifying what is holding you back. If you need help to figure out the past first, then approaching a therapist is suitable. If, on the other hand, you are able to come to terms with the past, and you are more keen to move forward, then a good coach can partner you in the journey. In both cases, working closely in a space of psychological safety can help you build the stepping stones to overcome the gravitational pull of the mind patterns. One approach a coach may use is to create an understanding of what mental patterns are and how one can dis-identify with them so they lose their power over you.

 

Finally, what can you do to stay out of this tendency of falling into a phase of stagnation? This calls for having a powerful sense of Purpose in your life. A Purpose provides a sense of direction that energizes you every day and invariably includes serving others in some way. The biggest reason why a lot of successful professionals feel a sense of emptiness within, despite their outer success, is a lack of purpose and meaning. Sooner or later, we reach a phase in our lives where just the money, just the job-title, and just the balance-sheet size is not enough. This gap can be filled by finding a sense of purpose and meaning in our work. Then "How do you find Purpose?" is an excellent topic for another blog! In the meantime, I touch on this topic in different ways in these blogs: Second Innings and Finding your Ikigai.

 


Photo by Keegan Houser on Unsplash


 

The author, Anuj Chadha, is a Leadership Coach, Founder of Three Circles. At Three Circles, we build a deep understanding of what it takes to navigate the challenges that life throws at us. We partner with our clients, listen to their life & career aspirations, and support them to break through the obstacles that seem to be holding them back. Life is too precious to be unhappy, unsure, or unfulfilled. Partner with us as you re-imagine and re-create the Life that you Love!

 

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